Michelle Lawrence's Blog

MegaCon 2010

2010-03-16T01:12:00Z

My first convention. I had a great weekend. Met so many favorites in movies, art, TV and fan favorites. MegaCon was terrific. The pictures are on my site www.michelle.lawrence.net

It was a great experience and I will be doing it again. I was laughing, smiling, giggling, oohing and ahhing all weekend. My cheeks hurt from being so happy.

LeVar Burton and Brent Spiner are the best. They are great together; brilliant and funny. I was such a treat to meet these people who I've watched, admired and loved on television for so long.

Nichelle Nichols. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. She was amazing to see. So graceful. Such an inspiration to talk to.

Joe Jusko (HUGS) and George Perez. I've read comics and book featuring their artwork since I was a kid, and to see them was amazing. A total fangirl moment. Giddy as a schoolgirl. WHOOT.

Neil Kaplan who does the character voice of Tychus from Starcraft and Optimus Prime from Transformers is a genuine character, honest and really sweet guy. He was great with his character voices and made everyone giddy.

Brian, Tre, Jeremy, Edward, Nikki and I were in nerd/geek heaven. LOL. I have a great family.

In a nutshell my weekend was fucking awesome!

Michelle

Sent on the Now Network� from my Sprint® BlackBerry

Texting Jamaican Style

2010-02-05T18:57:00Z

Jamaican Messaging & Texting Slang

TWY = Tek Weh Yuself
XA = X Amount
AO = Alms Ouse
BPT = Back Pon Top
BOAL = Buss Out A Laff
BOABDL = Buss Out A Big Dutty Laff
CAS = Crack A Smile
DWL = Dead Wid Laff
DWLAPUMS = Dead Wid Laff And Peepee Up Mi Self
FR = Fi Real
KMNB = Kiss Mi Neck back
KYAWO = Kut Yeye And Wheel Out
LIH = Lick Innu Head
LM = Likkle More
MPD = Mad People Dem
MYODB = Mine Yuh Own Dyamn Biznezz
NR = Nuff Respect
AMART = A me a run tings

2010 January edition of Style-ology Magazine is live

2010-01-09T18:20:00Z

*** The 2010 January edition of Style-ology Magazine is live***

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WTF

2010-01-09T05:28:00Z

Ever been looking for something and moved the item you are looking for to look for it?

Work and the Weird

2010-01-09T05:18:00Z

I know I cannot be the only one that stupid, funny, crazy shit happens to at work. I want to hear some stories. Send me some so I can post it.

I have so many. I'm writing them out so I can share. Hope I won't offend anyone.

Black People On the Radio

2010-01-09T01:26:00Z

Am I the only person who gets absolutely annoyed at radio and television commercials that "sounds" black?
You know the ones....Regular ads on the radio or even the television; they change the tone of the way the actor or spokesperson speaks to appeal to the black race.

Do I really need to hear an ad start with "Hey girl." on a radio or TV station that has a larger black audience as opposed to "Hi Betty" on ABC or the standard stations just because I'm black? I speak English. I can read and write. I don't need shit translated.

I'm listening to HOT 105 on my way home, the Michael Baisden show by the way, and that is a whole nother topic, anywho.....so, the commercials were normal.
You know.
Geico - They talk about the money you could be saving. I already have Geico, so I feel like I'm already saving a ton of money and the googly eyes are watching me. Standard commercial.

Then Home Depot comes on. I heard this one before, but I never really listened. I'm usually talking to Tre on the way home. This time I listened.
"Hey girl," is how it starts, you probably heard it too. There are about three of them that I've heard so far. If anyone gets a chance listen to them and see if it offends you.

There are also ads in black audience magazines. Don't get me wrong. I want to see black people in advertisements for black people. Surely, a white woman can't sell me Dark & Lovely Relaxer or Twists n Locks. No. No. No. But do I need Twa'nikyshia to get on the radio or TV and be ghetto as hell to tell me that Home Depot can sell me a backyard grill.

Quotes

2009-07-23T01:54:00Z

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear brighter until you hear them speak.

~unknown

Hate don't look good on you, so why do you keep putting it on.

~steve harvey

Religion

2009-07-13T20:00:00Z

When discussing religion I feel uncomfortable. Not for myself, but for the other person. Because my belief could very well be a religion of its own. Although there are religions that are similar to my beliefs, I have yet to find The One that I seek. So I cannot claim one single religion.

Dreams and Real Life

2009-07-02T18:00:00Z

There are moments when I wonder if something I experienced was real or a dream. At times, I just can't remember. I can't decipher my reality from my dreams.
Why?
Because my mind is always creating. Stories, quotes, questions, ideas, etc.... It blends so easily with my dreams. And my dreams are at times so detailed and realistic.

Good vs Evil

2009-06-12T10:39:00Z

It seems at times that 'evil' is more tangible than 'good'. I find that this is because 'good' relies on faith. And when we lack faith, it is so easy to see what we know as evil. At times my faith is tested, and it is in those times that I realize I do have faith, because I doubt it so very much.

Whatever Happened To Customer Service?

2009-05-13T03:08:00Z

We went to a restaurant on Sunday night. It was kinda late, 8:40 when we left the house and knew that since it was Sunday a lot of places would be closed or closing. So we opted for a buffet, that way we would not have to wait to be served and therefore taking up our little time left.

Anywho, we arrive at a Chinese buffet in Deerfield, on the corner of SW 10th and Federal, one that we have been to before. We pull up and the sign says it closes at 10:00pm. Now mind you we passed other places that closed at 9:30pm for the simple fact that we did not want to get the last bit of food and have them not bring out any more.

So we go in and it’s 9:05pm. We get seated and I stay at the table to give the waitress our drink order…they never came. So I get up and got to the food area. Walking around with my plate to get the same shit I get every time. Nothing. And I mean nothing. I was standing there in disbelief at the audacity of a restaurant to advertise that they close at 10pm and here it is 9:10pm and they have no food out. Well Edward and Tre got food. What I consider scraps really, cause the noodles Tre had was all onions and peppers. Edward…well, if you know Edward, you know he ate what he found.

Me, well I am the kind of person that tips based on service, so at this point the tip was $0. It got worse as I was standing there and looked over to another part of the restaurant and saw the Mexican staff eating freshly prepared food. WHAT THE FUCK? So I ask a waitress if they are preparing more food and this bitch act like she only speak Chinese. Three other people get fed up, put their plate on the counter and walked out. I go back to the table and sit with no food. Told Edward I will wait and get something on the way home.

Edward is like “Naw.” He gets up and raises hell, telling them to make some more of what I wanted. And comes back. Then the bitch, come to take our drink order…Yea. After all that. It now 9:18. I finally go get some food and while I am getting my food they are packing up the stuff around me. Talk about rushed.

By the time I get back to the table and start eating another Chinese guy comes over and says. “You get more food?” I couldn’t even look at his ass. I just said no. As soon as he goes back over to the food area, he says some shit in Chinese and they start throwing soap and water all over the floor. They are packing up all the stuff and everyone that is still in the restaurant just starts to feel uncomfortable. People start to get up to leave. This is unbelievable. And moreso, when one of the little Mexican men comes over to stand by our table looking directly at us. No joke! He was right next to me. I could not even turn my head and Tre was eyeballing me to look at him. I looked at my phone and it said 9:40.

We felt like we were inconveniencing them by coming to eat there. Why the hell say you are open till 10:00pm and you start packing up at 9:00pm. Shit, stop taking customers at 9:00pm then.

I expect to get the same fresh food I get when a restaurant opens at 9:00am that I get at 9:45pm right before they close. If they don’t want to serve like that or have my expectations set then stop taking people at a certain time.

They are there to serve the public. Not make the public feel like they are being a hindrance.

Hell, even Popeyes or KFC, when they first open and makes their first batch of chicken, if you come right before they close they will throw some more in and tell you up front it will take 5 -10 minutes to cook so you have to wait. It might be with an attitude, but I know I’m getting some fresh chicken.

White Anger

2009-05-07T21:18:00Z

These are some comments posted from: http://theroot.com
It's funny how dumb people really are. It's funny that people are still racist and some people are in denial.
Anyone that knows me, knows that I am always on the lookout. I can't be surprised by racism.

Anyhow, the comment was posted by a white person....

Ever since Barack Obama became president, white people seem to have developed a new kind of resentment toward blacks that I think is a direct result of these new issues of unemployment, homelessness and the credit crunch. These were always mostly "minority problems", but now that the chickens have come home to roost, whites seem madder than ever that we now have to pick at the scraps just like everyone else. That special "first dibs entitlement" that we got used to no longer exists and someone needs to be blamed. Of course, only the biggest fools will point to a president who's only been in office for three months, instead of the numerous WHITE men who came before him. Go figure!

Race has always been a factor in everything we do in this country and it won't go away just because a black man is president. And yes, he is black. If you knew nothing of his background you would not think, "there goes a half white man". I don't understand why we MUST assign some "level" whiteness to any black person that is even moderately successful. Of course, if OJ were half white, no one would say a word - LOL!

And as far as slavery being abolished by a white man. Abraham Lincoln also said if he could save the union without freeing one slave, he would do it. His primary objective was not to abolish slavery, it was to preserve the union that was divided on the issue of slavery, among many other factors. So enough about the glorious white man who saved blacks from something they should never have been forced to do in the first place. It's like asking someone to thank the rapist for not killing them afterward.

Jamaicans vs Haitians

2009-05-02T17:13:00Z

Update: Someone asked these questions.
Where is the secret Hatian car lot that still sells Datsuns and 80's Camry?
How are these old ass cars getting 30 day tags?

~~~~~~~~~~~~
For some reason these two countries don't get along. I know how I feel, but I'm going to ask some other people questions and see what they say.

From Jamaicans about Haitians
- The word Haitian or Haiti sounds dirty.
- Haitians stink and don't bathe or use deodorant.
- Haitians clothes never match. Plaid, floral and stripes just don't go together.
- Haitians need to stop driving around with flags on their car like they are in a presidential motorcade.
- They are too strict with the way they discipline their children.
- Dem nyam cat. (translation from Patwa - They eat cat)
- Haitians do voodoo.

From Haitians about Jamaicans
- Jamaican's think they are better than other people. Their country is as poor as any other third-world country.
- They think they can do everything. They have too many jobs.
- All Jamaican's smoke weed.
- Rastafarian is NOT a religion.
- They practice Obeah.

Some Things in Life

2009-05-01T18:26:00Z

Well shit happens! It's called LIFE, and sometimes it doesn't happen the way you want it to or the way you plan for it to. So you should just pick yourself up and start over. You have your whole life to get it right.

I have learned to try and let go of resentment. Yes, it hard as hell. Especially when it's something that you have to face everyday or there are reminders. But as adults we need to grow up eventually and let go.

Style-ology Magazine April 2009 Issue

2009-04-17T20:41:00Z

The Editor-in-Chief is....Sharon Gray. Yup. How cool is that.

Show your love.

2009 April Edition is LIVE

Please show your support and check out the new edition of Style-ology Magazine and Share your thoughts!!

Style-ology Magazine April09 Issue "Flower Power"

http://issuu.com/styleologymagazine/docs/april09

(select "fullscreen" button at the far left side for better viewing)

The Magazine's homepage is http://www.styleologymag.com/

Examples of why the English language is so hard to learn

2009-04-07T02:01:00Z

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Let's face it - English is a crazy language.

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor
pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in
France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese?
One index, 2 indices?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't a race at all).

That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

And that's not all, but we have to end for now.

~unknown

Patois (PA-twah)

2009-04-01T02:39:00Z

Jamaicans often drop the h's (thus 'ouse' instead of house) and add them in unexpected places (e.g., 'hemphasize'). Many have difficulty pronouncing 'th' and then drop the 'h'; hence t'ree for three, t'anks for thanks. The is usually pronounced as de and them as dem. They also sometime drop the w, as in ooman (woman).

Top Ten - From A Man's Point Of View.

2009-03-31T17:54:00Z

Here is a list I'm sure a lot of people are familiar with, as it was being passed around on the internet for the longest. It's called The Top Ten Reasons Why It’s Hard to Date a Black Woman.

Sometimes love can make a person bitter. Very bitter! So bitter that they can't imagine going through the pain again, so they resent the opposite sex and sometimes it goes extreme and they resent the whole race of that sex. For instance, Black men hating Black women.

Along with the list is an analysis of the list by a black man. Probably the manliest man I know. You know the kind of man that will pick something out of a toilet bowl for you. The kind of man that will pick up a frog, snake, cockroach..Hell, he just isn’t afraid of nothing. He watches scary movies in the dark to make it scarier. Shit that grosses you out will make him laugh - while he's touching it. He makes you feel like if a bullet was being shot at him it would be deflected by his sheer manliness alone. YEA! That kind of man!

So here's the list, with the analysis below.

The Top Ten Reasons Why It’s Hard to Date a Black Woman

1. Black women make black men feel under appreciated, unwarranted and irresponsible and regressive.
2. Black women are too aggressive and no longer patient in waiting on the pursuit of a man.
3. Black women are strong headed, too independent which presents great challenges in relationships.
4. Black women are masculine in that they are controlling and like to run the relationship.
5. Black women expect too much. They are gold diggers who will not look twice at a blue collar black man.
6. Black women are hot headed and have bad attitudes.
7. Black women stop caring about their appearance after a certain age.
8. Black women are not as sexually open as other races, especially in regards to oral sex.
9. Black women’s tolerance is far too low; they are no longer empathetic to the black man’s struggle in white America.
10. Black women do not cater to their men.

This Is My Ten Based On His Analysis Of Above

1. Black women do NOT make us feel the way that he described. This comes from us and us alone. A Black man tends to be more aware and almost on the edge of paranoia about his placement within society and in the world, that he knows. It is human nature to feel victim to the events that happen in life. Mostly because in our minds and hearts we know that we are the main characters in our story of life and we want to be the hero. No one can make us feel those things if we choose not to allow them. The only thing that another can do is to try to establish the environment in which they exist. If this is, in fact, the truth…then once again his argument of blaming the black woman falls short.

2. Aggression is once again based on a person environment, drive, and perception…in other words…it’s an opinion. Our society has developed the feeling that time is always running out. The black woman did NOT create this. Different stresses have been applied to both genders in reference to this. A modern black woman has been driven into inner turmoil because of this. Her key challenges in life lay somewhere between her youthful introduction to men, sex, womanhood, relationship, marriage to independence, strength, lack of trust, sex as a tool, and age. It is no easier for her than the man.

3. There are ALWAYS challenges to relationships! This is a painful illusion that is fed throughout our community. A black woman is ULTIMATELY a woman! This should not EVER be forgotten. I have NEVER met a headstrong, independent black woman that has destroyed a relationship for those reasons alone. Those attributes, when combined with hurt, bitter, jealous, or resentful…then become the chemical compound that has the ability to challenge or destroy a relationship. If you take those SAME attributes and mix them with love, compassion, leadership (as a mother, sister, or daughter), or wife then the chemical compound you end up with adds pure power to the relationship.

4. This comes down to the choices of the man…period. EVERY person searches for certain qualities in their mate while attracting others. If you’re dating a butch, then leave her or shut the fuck up! Yes, some women are pushy and want to run the relationship…if you don’t like it, then be a man and stop it. If you can’t then your answer is pretty simple, in my book…shut the fuck up!

5. A black woman is supposed to expect more…PERIOD!! This is the same for a man, a parent, and a child!! Conflict and struggle create improvement in people. This is something to be embraced. A woman is taught to seek the man that can take care of her and a man is taught to seek a woman to take care of. It is the ones that take it to the extremes that paint the picture of ‘BAD’ for the others.

6. Not all black women are hot headed with attitudes. As for the ones that are…SO WHAT?!? If you have the patience, try engaging in a conversation to find out why. If she won’t allow it…fuck it and move on.

7. I guess this muthafucka hasn’t looked in the mirror! This shit is called…LIFE. I will spell it out for the slow…the main purpose of looking sexy is to attract a mate…PERIOD! After a relationship has started, you’re living together or married, and children are born and the light bill comes…and the mortgage is late…and the job is acting ‘funny’ and going to restaurants has been replaced with leftovers…a woman’s priorities change!! So does a man’s!! Yes, being healthy and in shape is important, but sexiness for a couple changes from everyday to holidays and times without kids.

8. I can’t even believe that this nigga is saying some shit like this! He must be gay!! Nigga, get control of yourself!! Talk to your woman, teach your woman, shave your dick…nigga, do something to change that or shut the fuck up!!! Hell, if you’re comparing her to your boyfriend, of course it’s going to seem like she’s not doing it enough!

9. The day you sit around wondering about the black woman being empathetic to your bullshit is the day you need to be drug outside and shot!! Why in the HELL are you expecting this kind of shit from a black woman or anybody? Why would they give a shit about you and your struggles? We all struggle. We all hurt. We all succeed and we all have felt failure. A single woman seeking a strong man is attracted to one who has risen beyond this type of thinking. It is almost instinct for her to seek this because it adds power to the relationship and it sets the example for the children that she eventually wants to bear from a man of this caliber.

a. Empathy is NICE, but it is not…I say again…is NOT a requirement from anyone!! The black man has been the most hated creature in America since her birth as a nation. Unless you were born the day before the creation of America, you have no idea what it feels like to be loved completely by this nation. This means that you have grown up in a sea of misfortune, hate, bigotry, and racism. Now, tell me, honestly, if you know any difference? You don’t! I don’t need a black woman to be sensitive to my plight as a black man…I need to gather my strength to rise above it! Any black man that achieves this, will notice a different TYPE of black woman attracted to him and this WILL change his thinking about them as a whole, as well as about himself.

10. No, they don’t cater to us…hell, no one does. I don’t give a shit anymore. Can we talk about something I care about, now?

Enhancing

2009-03-18T06:22:00Z

I was thinking about how all these athletes are being busted for what is called 'performance enhancing'. Well we, the public, expect to see these athlete perform at their peak for our entertainment, and since the use of performance enhancing drugs is to improve athletic performance, there is a question of how this might be a good thing. Since they are paid millions of dollars for the purpose of entertaining us, it makes sense that they would do what is necessary to excell in their field. Did you know that the use of drugs to enhance performance is considered unethical by these sports organizations? Yet they make millions. Where is the ethics in that?

Anyways, isn't that what actor's do? Don't they use performance enhancing products, which are drugs? They get face lifts, injections, surgery...all to enhance their performance and last longer in the business of entertaining.

Kids these days

2009-02-03T12:14:00Z

Today's teens are far too disrespectful these days? And not just the teens, but toddlers too. I see kids acting like adults. They talk back to adults and do things you wouldn't even think about doing in the 80's. Yes, the 80's...when it wasn't illegal to spank your children or backhand them when they stepped out of line.
I know some people are against spanking, slapping, whipping or just plain ole beating a kid's ass. Many of these people don't have kids. But when the kids talk to them like shit they want to say the parents are to blame. Children are not with their parents 24/7. They are influenced by the corrupt world we live in and must be put in line as to what is right and what is wrong. This is where the parents come in and this is where many fail, because they do not have the support of the corrupt world that has fucked up these children in the first place.

My child should flinch when I raise my hand at him. If he don't and he want to push up on me, there is a problem and it's time to get a bigger object than my hand. He's tall, way taller than me, but like I tell him, "If I can't get you when you're standing up, I'll get you when you're laying down."

Nothing is more embarrassing than seeing a parent in public with a child disrespecting them. They stand there like they have no idea what to do. I must walk away. My son will usually take my hand, hug me and say, "I love you, Mom." Cause he tells me that he knows seeing that just make me mad at him for no reason. That's not true. It makes me mad at him FOR a reason. Because I'm thinking that he's looking at that and plotting.
It's getting hard these days to raise good kids. Without punishment, many parents are getting walked all over and children are doing what they want. Unfortunately, parenting is a difficult job, and most people are just making do.